Oh how I hate the phrase ‘I told you so.’ Especially when it has to do with something that I’ve reviled for so long that it has become a second nature to me. But for all those Britney fans out there that have been holding on to faith and belief (in what, I still don’t know), here’s your opportunity to get your licks in.
“Blackout” is the new album from that girl with the crazy baby mama drama, and it hits shelves Tuesday, October 30th. Her true blue fans have already begun posting on various sites about “how good it is” and what a departure from her old sound. Well I question both statements, but the truth is, and Lord it pains me to say it, the album’s not half bad. There are no slow ballads, which is key when your voice isn’t your best asset. All the tracks are up tempo electronic dance beats, with a noticeable difference in style since teaming up with ‘Danja’ vs. her last big hype ‘Slave 4 U’ which was produced by the Neptunes. Whatever beef Danja may have had with his mentor Timbaland (it was rumored the two had a falling out after Timbaland backed off of the Spears project, but Danja stayed on despite Timbaland’s “advisement” to do otherwise), it’s obvious he’s got game. And the ole girl takes an interesting swipe at the media in her song “Piece Of Me.”
“I’m Miss American dream since I was 17/ Don’t matter if I step on the
scene or sneak away to the Philippines/They still gone put pictures of
my derriere in the magazine/You want a piece of me/I'm Miss Bad Media
Karma/Another day another drama/Guess I can't see no harm in working
and being a mama/And with a kid on my arm I’m still an exceptional earner
/You want a piece of me/I’m Mrs. Life styles of the rich and famous (you
want a piece of me)/I’m Mrs. Oh My God that Britney’s Shameless(you want
a piece of me)/I’m Mrs. Extra exra-liscious thing (you want a piece of me)/
I’m Mrs. She’s too big now she’s too thin(you want a piece of me)”
I’m not one to champion trivial pop music, but you gotta love a song that points out that pictures of Britney grocery shopping still be making people money. Now THAT is whack! But it’s true, and whatever you think of her, the girl’s got a point. She can be fat, thin, a hot ghetto mess, and people are still going to get a cut of that money.
And that scares the hell out of me. When Britney Spears starts making sense to me, then Armageddon must be on the horizon. There are a few obvious tracks about her ex, but since I highly doubt her ability to fully pen a sentence, much less lyrics, I’m assuming they just happen to have been good song submissions at the time. After listening to the entire album back to front, I can see why she passed on ‘Umbrella.’ The song just wouldn’t have fit (oh, and Britney, Rihanna says thank you for it).
Now of course, you may be wondering how I managed to get my hands on a copy. Well I didn’t. I simply hooked it up on MTV’s “The Leak.” So I won’t be the only shame faced listener, I’ve included the link below for your perusing pleasure. For the true doubters, I highly recommend you listen to her Ms. Jackson-esque ‘Why Should I Be Sad,’ the last track on the album. Then I want you to remember this little comeback tidbit: Madonna, ‘Ray Of Light.’ It pains me a great deal to say it again, but she has made a comeback with this album. If she can stay off drugs, she may have just pulled the fastest one on all of us yet.
Blackout on “The Leak”:
http://www.mtv.com/music/the_leak/britney_spears/blackout/#
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