You want fries with that?

The Labor Department reported that 4,000 jobs were lost from July to August of this year, ending a 4 year growth in jobs. According to a September 8, 2007 NY Times article, “The unemployment rate held steady at 4.6 percent in August, but economists said that was at least in part a fluke of the survey as more people stopped looking for work and were therefore not counted by the government as unemployed.” The unexpected loss in jobs, blamed partly on the recent mortgage crisis, have many pundits forecasting a recession. While others, like Oregon based-newspaper, ‘The Building Team Forecast,’ claim that, “Employment growth in the country has been decelerating for over twelve months.”

I want to be committed.

Officially, I have been gainfully unemployed for 10 months. Translation: I’ve been working, but I haven’t landed a full-time, career track gig since my forced corporate departure. What makes the situation worse is not only can I not find a job in this hazy market; I have NO IDEA what to pursue.

I have no industry specific definable skill (thank you liberal arts degree!). I sum myself up as a talker and a problem solver. It’s what I’m good at; it’s what I like to do. So tell me, what job is that exactly?

Exactly!

I didn’t care for the career path I was on fairly early. I stuck it out. I figured you gotta start somewhere. When month 3 hit, the gnawing itch to jump ship hit me again. Again, I held fast. After all, I was making progress, and who cared. I was eventually going to grad school. Right……

Fast forward two years later and I’m a corporate manager. Well this is how you “build a career” right? So why was I grinding my teeth in my sleep, suffering from acid reflux, and generally hoping the impending merger would lead to my impending lay-off? Well it did. What to do next?

Suddenly I wish I’d gotten more C’s in school. I spent so much time memorizing what “they” wanted me to learn, and less on the actual things I was good at and cared about. You cram it in just long enough to pass a test, knowing nary a hiring manager is going to give a damn about your ability to retain the events leading up to Waterloo. I actually liked learning, and school just wasn’t hard to me. What is hard is discovering what true talent I have, and how to market that and myself in this era.

I have no clue what to do with my life, because I’ve never done just one thing. As a result, I’m easily bored, regularly unchallenged, and generally pessimistic about my future prospects. Even in college I managed to breeze by with a GPA over 3.0, supported by a modicum of effort on my part. Hell, I even double majored.

What do you do when you’re the smart kid that turns “dumb?” Or as Kanye West put it in ‘School Spirit’, “This N- graduated at the top of our class. I went to Cheesecake he was a m- f- waiter there!” I have been left with an inability to move forward; a perpetual spinning of the wheels. What do you do with a complete set of encyclopedias? I have to go through the “kitchen sink” of things I know and decipher which of them is truly me.

My friends, whom I love, are not helping the situation. Doctors, lawyers, therapists, accountants, actuaries, entrepreneurs, engineers, journalists, sales execs, or typically just on track. I never feel in competition with them, rather I’m highly motivated to get my s#!@ together. Yet, here I am not doing anything. It’s exhausting, frustrating, depressing, and at times, defeating.

I know what I don’t want to do, and in this tight hiring market, that’s not going to get me very far. Where do I focus my energy, so I can lose this nagging feeling that everyone else is out running the race while I’m back at the starting line trying to figure out what happened to the course map “they” gave me.

You can spend 12 – 16+ years worrying about GPA, extra curricular pursuits, and what looks good on paper, instead of cultivating an art form or skill. I’m not saying students should stop learning skills and information outside of their passions. I just think the greater focus should be on cultivating natural talents and interests. You know, maybe focus on the reality of the situation students will face when they “go out there” and begin building lives for themselves.

On ‘Inside the Actor’s Studio,’ Dave Chappelle told a story about how his dad wanted him to become a teacher. It was good steady pay, and a reliable profession, compared to stand-up comedy and the entertainment industry. Chappelle’s response to his father was that if he could make the same amount of money, doing comedy and being an entertainer, that he could make as a teacher, then that in his mind was achieving success. Not too many people you come across will serve it to you like that.

Had he been the guest speaker at my graduation instead of some forgettable face with a forgettable name, maybe he would’ve said:

Take the time to figure it out. As they say, McDonald’s is always hiring. Keep the money coming in, but keep your mind focused on figuring YOU out.

When the signs are clear to get out; get out. Don’t try to rationalize it, or reason with yourself. Especially over money.

No one’s living your life, but you. If they don’t get your vision, it’s because “it” doesn’t work for them and probably never will.

Taking time to define your goals isn’t an invitation to be lazy, but if you realize early on that the standard rules do not apply to you, then find or make the ones that do and get out of the particular game you’re in.

Define yourself so that the definition truly fits.

I like what I’m doing right now at this moment, but the world is full of unwanted opinions and unnecessary diatribe, and success is built upon whether or not people want to hear what you have to say. I can’t say that they do, but I put it out there, because at least I know my point’s been made. I’m waiting. Waiting to figure it out; waiting to get it right.

Waiting.